One of the greatest shortfalls of parents raising dogs and children in the same household is that they often place all of the responsibility on the dog. They assume that a well-trained, well-socialized dog is all they need to ensure the safety of all involved. They often will completely ignore that the dog is only on piece of the dog-parent-kid relationship. Parents need to work with their child to teach them safe behaviors and boundaries when interacting with dogs.
Dog aficionados are quick to assert that the parent needs to teach the child “respect” for dogs, but infrequently is there a detailed description of how, exactly, a parent should teach that respect.
One of the first things we had to teach E. was that dogs don’t like their paws touched.
Here are some examples of safe boundaries/rules that will help children living with family dogs understand and respect their dogs’ needs. Parents can begin working on these as soon as the child is mobile or shows interest in the dog. Children can begin to grasp these well before their second birthday.
- Dogs don’t like to be bothered while they are eating.
- Dogs don’t like their toys taken away from them.
- Dogs don’t like to be woken from a sleep.
- Dogs like to be pet with hands, not with objects.
- Dogs don’t like hugs and kisses.
- Dogs don’t like their paws, ears, nose, mouths, eyes or tails touched.
- Dogs don’t like to be chased.
- Dogs don’t like to be sat on, crawled on, bounced on or fallen on.
E. learns that dogs don’t like to be bothered while they’re eating.
These are examples of “no” rules, but certainly, toddler-dog interactions shouldn’t be limited to what they can’t do. It’s important to teach them what they can do, too, and praise them lavishly for it. While a young toddler might not be able to grasp “Ask three times,” or be expected to learn doggie communication signals, there are things they can begin to learn that will help them interact with dogs in a safe, fun, and mutually-beneficial way.
- “Gentle” touch.
- Offering treats safely to dogs, with an open palm.
- Dogs like to be pet on their backs.
- Dogs like to be pet with one hand. Two hands is too much!
It is a good idea to teach children the safest possible interactions, regardless of how their particular dog reacts to certain situations. For example, even if a family dog has never demonstrated guarding behavior, it’s still a good idea for parents to teach their children not to approach while eating, or take toys away from the dog. The reason for this is that the child may be exposed to many, many dogs in their lifetime, some of whom may feel differently about sharing their food/toys.
Tell me, readers, what dog-related rules or boundaries have you taught your toddlers?
